bits of information i get which i should be happy about - where i can let my guard down and not have to worry about her presence. im disappointed.
im actually upset she wont be around. and i shouldnt be.
i cant understand why.
i dont understand any of this.
i cant for the life of me understand why this bothers me so.
is my business with her still unfinished?
it most definitely has on her end. i sure as hell dont stand for anything in her life..
so why the fuck am i still so hung up on this?!
she's lucky i havnt been the crazy ex who calls nonstop and sends crazy emails. iv been the crazy ex by myself - ranting to friends who cannot stand it any longer.
silent suffering and self pity.
i am wallowing in it all again right now.
